Contre Aoute Attente (Part I)
By: Sensei Raven Ekundayo
Contre Aoute Attente means against all odds in French. When hearing Ja’Malik’s story that resonates loudly in my mind. This brother has made a way out of seemingly no way over and over again for himself. He wanted a new life and made it happen, he had a passion for something and went after it, when left with a career threatening injury he worked his butt off to get back on top. Against ALL odds Ja’Malik has fought to live his best life. He doesn’t know defeat, he only rises. For this reason I wanted him for this month’s “Circle of Life” interview. I hope you all enjoy learning more about this awesometastic human being.
Raven – For our readers who may not be familiar with you, give us a brief back story on where you come from.
Ja’Malik – I was born in Cleveland, Ohio in a predominantly Black, low income area. It was the roughest area you could think of in Cleveland. My neighbors were later known as Bone Thugs-N-Harmony. They lived pretty much next door to me.
Raven – Oh wow, ok.
Ja’Malik – I spent a lot of my youth there. However, I say I grew up in New York. That’s where I learned to be an adult; pretty much all of the qualities I possess now I got from growing up in New York.
Raven – Ok, and at what age did you move to New York?
Ja’ Malik – I moved to New York the day after I graduated high school, so I was like 17.
Raven – The day after? You didn’t waste any time did you? (Laughs)
Ja’Malik – I knew I wanted to get out (I begin to laugh again when he says this). I’m thinking I can’t spend another moment here.
Raven – Most people like to enjoy that last summer in their hometown.
Ja’Malik – No not me; if I could’ve left a week before graduation I would’ve. I was definitely ready, I was ready to start life and fully become a dancer and it was a dead end in Cleveland.
When Ja’Malik was 4 years old he saw Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” for the first time. He became obsessed with the dance moves, studying them over and over. He says he watched the video 7 times the first day he was introduced to it. By the 7th time he had every move down, even small mannerisms with MJ’s hands. He performed this choreography everywhere, in the kitchen, in the front yard, down the street. He said he didn’t know he wanted to be a dancer at the time, he just knew he loved everything about “Thriller”. The journey started there. His neighbors noticed his love of dance, and their daughter was into it as well. They had her in an African dance class in East Cleveland and one day Ja’Malik went along. He took the class and hated it. He says the girls had so many beautiful options for dances that they could do, while the guys only had one step, one step for an entire hour and fifteen minutes of class. He says even at 6 (The age he was when this happened) he knew that there’s no way the girls would get to do all of this, and the guys couldn’t. He says he believes this was his introduction to what sexism looks like. The girls were allowed to be free in their beautiful movements, while the teachers didn’t want the boys to do too much…..so he never went back. The neighbor’s daughter then began going to a ballet school, and Ja’Malik followed her there. He took one class and fell in love. The school offered him a life time scholarship.
Raven – So you were there until graduation?
Ja’Malik – Pretty much; I was going to The Cleveland School of Science at the time. My neighbor got into The Cleveland School of The Arts and I begged my grandmother to audition every day. She always said no, she said I needed a real education and a real job. “You won’t make no money twirling around” is what she would say. So one day the following spring the school held auditions, and I went without telling my grandmother. I went to every neighbor on my street and asked them all for five dollars so I could get dance clothes. I went to the audition by myself and I got in. I performed “If” by Janet Jackson.
Raven – Yes “IF”!
Ja’Malik – So you can imagine an 11/12 year old boy… (We both fall out laughing). Now mind you, I hadn’t been taking ballet classes for that long, so I still didn’t really know what the hell to do, but I loved it. I knew I loved the video, kind of in the same way that I loved “Thriller”. It’s very sexual movements, grabbing the crotch, gyrating your hips and everything. So I’m in there dancing for my absolute life and my dance teacher, who’s now one of my best friends, will tell you that I was just dancing and she thought I was so cute. The next thing you know I get a letter in the mail saying I was accepted into The Cleveland School for The Arts, and my grandmother was FURIOUS!
Raven – I was just about to ask you how she responded to that, lol.
Ja’Malik – She was furious, but she couldn’t stop me, I was going to go. She gave up and let me go.
Raven – That took a great deal of confidence in yourself to stand up to your grandmother like that, at such a young age.
Ja’Malik – That’s just the kind of kid I was. I was very strong willed. My grandmother was a genius at math so she really wanted me to be at the science school, because I was also good at math. She thought that should be it for me, but once I got a taste of that dance life I just couldn’t…
Raven – Was your grandmother still with us when you graduated?
Ja’Malik – Yes, she actually died shortly after I graduated.
Raven – Where was your relationship with her in regards to your dance career as you were leaving for NYC?
Ja’Malik – Well she didn’t come to my graduation, but that’s another story for another day. She came into my room later that night after I graduated, and she asked me what I was doing. I told her I was packing to head to New York. She asked how much money I have and I told her about 15 bucks. She went into her room to give me $41.00 to catch the train, and that was it. I was headed to New York the next morning.
Raven – Ok, pause pause pause. So this isn’t a conversation that you all had prior to you leaving? No planning in advance?
Ja’Malik – No, nobody knew I was leaving. I mean they kind of had an idea because I attended the December sleepover at The Julliard School, where you apply to come and spend a week at the school. So I knew I wanted to go to Julliard. I auditioned and was placed on the waiting list. So when I graduated I didn’t know if I was going to get into college, I was just going.
Ja’Malik wasn’t accepted into Julliard. He still felt that he would need to go to college. He says he wanted the degree, and also he didn’t feel as though he had enough high quality training that he’d need to get into the dance companies that he wanted to be in. He admits that the first day living in NYC was hard. His former teacher from Cleveland had moved to Harlem, and his aunt and uncle lived in Long Island City. He says he planned to start off staying with his former teacher when he first arrived. He didn’t have a cell phone back then and no way of getting in contact with her. So for a couple of days he slept at Port Authority in Times Square (If you’ve lived in NYC you know he was a brave soul for doing that). He would leave his belongings in a locker, go out into the city to take dance classes, come back to change clothes, and continued this cycle. He finally was able to meet up with his former teacher and stayed with her for awhile. He decided to go to The Joffrey Ballet School to take classes. He was offered an opportunity to join a program at The New School University for free, so he took it. Once he started school and was in a dorm things finally started to be normal.
Raven – So what do you believe is the most powerful story you’ve ever told through dance?
Ja’Malik – Oh, ummmm. I would probably have to say a solo I choreographed in high school. It was the first time I dealt with the deaths in my family. My father passed away when I was 4, and my mother passed away when I was 10 or 11. My grandfather was the love of my life. He was my everything; my rock, my provider, he was my best friend. I was born on his birthday so that created a very special bond between us. He died when I was 9 or 10. So my senior thesis was a piece I choreographed about the 3 of them passing away. So that’s probably the most powerful story I’ve told.
Raven – I know it may be impossible to do, but can you put into words what the eXperience of dancing that piece was like?
Ja’Malik – I’m not overly emotional, I wasn’t then and I’m still not. I didn’t cry when they passed, I mean I was 3 turning 4 when my father passed, so I didn’t really understand that. My mother and I had a tumultuous relationship so I didn’t really cry. I was sad to see her pass away, but I didn’t cry. With my grandfather I was more in a state of shock. I was a bad ass kid in school, but I had recently started to turn all of that around. I’d gotten like 100% on a test that I was really nervous about, so I went running home so I could tell him. I could tell something was wrong as I approached the house. He would always sit in his chair by the window reading his newspaper, and I could see his window as I got closer to the house, and he wasn’t there. That solo released all of those emotions. I remember when I finished I broke down and cried for like an hour, I was sobbing and my friends in school were holding and consoling me. I was inconsolable.
Raven – Yeah, it was like a catharsis for you, that performance.
Ja’Malik – Yes completely, absolutely.
Raven – So what has been the greatest learning eXperience that you’ve had as a dancer?
Ja’Malik – As a dancer? Hmmm (pause) The greatest learning eXperience? (pauses again). It was probably with my last job. I got Injured; I tore my ACL in the middle of a performance.
Raven – Wow.
Ja’Malik – It was my first major injury and I’m like 30 something years old, So I didn’t know what was going to happen next. I didn’t know if I would be able to dance again or anything. But I had an amazing physical therapist that got me back in shape in six months, and it was supposed to take almost a year. She whipped my butt back into shape, and I was almost back to full dancing in six months. I was pretty good at six months, but she released me at nine months, I came back to the company and I didn’t have a job. They released me from my contract and I wasn’t aware. I believed I was coming back to my position when I was fully healed and released by my physical therapist. When I found this out it threw me into a complete state of depression. What I learned from that was how to delve into myself, and I found a new inner strength. I found a new passion because of this. During my physical therapy process, I was so out of shape and so weak, and my legs had atrophied so much that in order for me to get back into the company I would have to put in work. Once I was cleared to go back into the gym, and that was around 4 months, I went ham. I went from 140 pounds to about 160 within seven months, and it was all muscle. I was in that gym twice a day, I was serious about it because I wanted to come back to the dance company and I wanted to be stronger. So when I came back to that dance studio I had the body of a God (laughs). And that’s how I got into fitness.
Against all odds Ja’Malik fought himself not only back to his previous health, but beyond. Next month you’ll hear the story of the latest chapter in his life, Personal Trainer.
Connect with Ja’Malik:
www.Jamalikbbp.com